Two weeks in Peru was rather life changing. I very much enjoyed my time there, with our little jungle family, my best friend, novio, and the medicine men. I was happy to finally be taking serious, geographical, gastronomical action to improve my health. I enjoyed doing the dieta (despite being hungry for 10 days), the lack of electricity, not wearing makeup or fixing my hair, having minimal belongings, having meals cooked for us, some sweet moments with Der, the adorable cafe Ash and I went to twice where we were able to just be best-friend silly and talk about our dreams. There were certainly things I did not enjoy….like multiple arguments with the boy, getting eaten alive by bugs in the bungalow, my inability to calm my mind, some of the eternal nights. It was NOT easy! Which made it even that much more worth it. I started to really feel better by the end of the trip and my appetite trickled back to me.
Coming back to the states has been hard b/c I feel very sensitive to crowds and noise and mainstream anything. Even now, 5 weeks later, I miss the quiet jungle, the candlelit bungalow, the sound of the river and tiny monkeys swinging through the trees. I miss the fresh papaya juice, ceviche, juanes, taximotos, hearing and speaking Spanish, how my skin glowed and hair waved. I miss the simplicity of it all. I’m really struggling being back also b/c I do not want to live here anymore. I have zero desire to be in this city. I broke up with the novio, which despite being terribly sad and terrifying, has been somewhat like releasing an anchor that I didn’t even realize I had. I don’t know exactly when that relationship went from being supportive and uplifting to toxic. In any case, it has been fuel to the fire in my desire to leave.
Peru was so much of what I needed and I ache to go back. I believe that my broken wings started to mend there, and I am eternally grateful.